The Adapted Gottman “I Appreciate You" Checklist

(Adapted from Dr. John Gottman)

Instructions: Think about the selected aspects of your spouse’s personality and circle only three adjectives that describe him/her. The next time you notice one of these characteristics in your partner, share it with them using phrases such as “I appreciate it when you _________” or “I noticed when you __________”.  Make it a habit to share at least three of these appreciative statements with your partner a week.

1. Loving
2. Sensitive
3. Brave
4. Intelligent
5. Thoughtful
6. Generous
7. Loyal
8. Truthful
9. Strong
10. Energetic
11. Sexy
12. Decisive
13. Creative
14. Imaginative
15. Fun
16. Attractive
17. Interesting
18. Supportive
19. Funny
20. Considerate
21. Affectionate
22. Organized
23. Resourceful
24. Athletic
25. Cheerful
26. Coordinated
27. Graceful
28. Elegant
29. Gracious
30. Playful
31. Caring
32. A great friend
33. Exciting
34. Thrifty
35. Planful
36. Committed
37. Involved

38. Expressive 
39. Active
40. Careful
41. Reserved
42. Adventurous
43. Receptive
44. Reliable
45. Responsible
46. Dependable
47. Nurturing
​48. Warm
49. Relaxed
50. Kind
51. Gentle
52. Practical
53. Passionate
54. Witty
55. Relaxed
56. Beautiful
57. Handsome
58. Rich
59. Calm
60. Lively
61. A great partner
62. A great parent
63. Assertive
64. Protective
65. Sweet
66. Tender
67. Powerful
68. Flexible
69. Understanding
70. Silly
71. Shy
72. Vulnerable
73. Open

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Sara Paules, LPC
Therapist
Mindful Soul Center